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Help! Prayer Isn’t Changing My Husband

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Prayer changes everything. That’s the truth. The problem is that we don’t understand the whole truth. We take those three words and apply them to people, situations and life in general just exactly the way we want.

Prayer does indeed change everything. Sometimes we can’t see the changes it’s making. Other times it’s making changes that we didn’t think were important. Often we get upset because the changes we wanted, the changes that pushed us to pray, those aren’t the things that change.

HELP Prayer Isn't Changing My Husband and tips

When a wife begins praying for her husband specifically, something pushed her in that direction. Whether there was a struggle in the office, a disagreement in their marriage, a stronghold on him personally or a spiritual battle that required her seeking the Lord on her knees. A wife prays for her husband because she loves him. He is the one who her soul loves. She needs him and knows that the battle that must be fought is best fought on her knees in prayer.

What happens when the wife’s prayers go unanswered? What happens when the issues aren’t resolved and the marriage is still on the rocks?

What happens when prayer isn’t changing your husband?

I’ve been the wife that has prayed for her husband in desperation. I’ve spent hours on my knees praying that God would give me direction, strength and love for the man that my soul loved. I’ve cried out to God questioning why the very changes I was praying for weren’t happening. I’ve asked God why the promises that He gives in His word regarding marriage weren’t part of my life.

When changes aren’t taking place, we tend to give up. We stop praying. We say God isn’t listening, start to believe that He doesn’t care, think that we can make it on our own…

Instead maybe we should ask ourselves…

What if the prayer you’re praying isn’t meant to change your husband?
All too often we’re ready to pray that God would change the actions, attitudes or people in general, but we don’t consider what changes we need to make ourselves. We fail to take a good hard look at us and beg God to change us…to make us into the woman He created us to be…the woman He wants us to be…the woman WE want to be. 

After ten challenging years of marriage, I’ve learned that often when I feel called to drop to my knees to pray about my husband that the changes that actually need to be made first need to happen in me.

What if the prayer you're praying isn't meant to change your husband Admitting that we need to change first is not an easy step when we set out to pray for our husbands. It is often how God moves on our husband’s hearts and begins to change them though. When our husbands see God working on, in and through us, changing us and making us more like Him, they will be more willing and accepting of God moving on them and in their lives.

What if your husband still doesn’t change through continued prayer?

This is the hardest part…When a wife seeks the Lord, is open to change for herself and continues to pray for her husband through it all, and she still doesn’t see the change she’s prayed about for her husband.

The answer is so easy to write and even to say, but is so hard to understand and take to heart.

God’s got this. He will work everything out for good because you love Him. It is your responsibility to continue seeking the Lord on your husband’s behalf and allowing God to change you to become more like Him. God will take care of the rest. He is faithful and will complete the good work in you and in your husband. It is in His timing that your prayers will be answered. God will answer. He is working on, in and through you and your prayers.

Never doubt that God is hearing your prayers. He knows them before you speak. Never doubt that He cares. He loved you before you were born. Never doubt that He will give you that which your soul desires that falls into accordance with His word. He will keep His promises. 

Hold tight to the Lord through prayer. He will be there for you each and every time you speak, whisper or cry out His name.

How can I pray for your marriage today?


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